The Red Threads That Tie Us…

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Archive for the month “June, 2009”

Fucked

I am so fucked. I realize the title might have given that away, but it also might give you the wrong impression. I’m not the good kind of fucked. Baaaaaaaaaaaaad.

I have to stop acting weird around Boyfriend’s parents. o_O I AM weird, dammit! How do I stop this when I am this? Dammit, dammit, dammit. I live with them currently, so I can keep it down for a little while, but not all the time.

Why do I have to be the talking to my food weird? Why can’t I be cute and adorable weird? Ugh. I can be lovable, right? Right?

Merrrrrr…. Any advice?

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The New Job

I have settled into my job, finished shadowing other case managers, and finally started setting up my own meetings with clients. This means that currently, I really don’t have a lot to do. This will change, and rapidly, once I start getting more meetings and the paperwork starts to pile up. So I should probably treasure this. But currently I’m getting paid to read Google news and I just can’t feel great about that. I even brought a book to work today.

I know, I know, I should revel in this brief moment, but I can’t help myself. I was raised by people who really believed in work ethic and as such, if someone is paying me to do something, I feel super guilty when I’m not doing that specific thing. Even if there isn’t anything else for me to BUT read the news and twiddle my thumbs.

But I am seriously enjoying this job. Probably more than I should. Shaba asked for more details on my soap opera clients and while I can’t tell quite a few wonderful tails due to that pesky confidentiality thing, I can say… Wow. Just, wow. You would have no idea what a subculture there is for the mentally ill. Seriously, it’s a subculture. Romantic relationships run like wildfire through the groups of these people and there are more fights than Melrose Place. Thankfully, most of them are verbal, but some aren’t. Police get called, restraining orders are filed, and god, there is one who just likes to stir the pot to see what trouble can be found and what life can be seriously messed with. It’s crazy!

But, I have to admit, the juicy details aren’t my favorite part of the job here. I’m a total sap, but I wouldn’t be me if this wasn’t true. My favorite part is hearing the success stories, reading case files and seeing the leaps and bounds people have made. I can’t wait to help clients achieve that. It’s what’s going to keep me going when someone has to go back to the hospital or I have to go bail someone out of jail.

Hello, Dawn

Okay, so it’s not really dawn. And it’s raining, so it wouldn’t matter if it was. But I was up at 530 this morning! Boyfriend had to get to a shift at the fire station. Because I’m a loving and awesome girlfriend, I stabbed myself cutting my bagel a bit ago in the hopes that it would be bad enough that I’d have to call for rescue (which is what he’s doing). Yeah… that’s totally why I jammed the knife in my palm AND the bagel. We’ll go with that.

Anyway, I am up freakishly early for me, especially when you consider that I’m showered, dressed, and just finished the last bite of my deadly bagel. This is the norm now. I get up at 7, do my thing, and go to work. Shaba will be shocked to know that I’m now drinking coffee. Kinda. When I need a pick me up, I grab a cup from the office and it has some pretty delicious flavors. I’m still not a huge fan, but I do drink it. I sort of need to because if I don’t eat enough, I get tired. Coffee breath is still awful.

So, the tired excuse of why you haven’t seen more of me is that I’m working all day and the house still needs work (not that I’ve done much there, sadly). So, I miss you, WordPress. But there might be more early morning blogs like this if I can keep this schedule going.

Oh, and working with the mentally ill? Totally like living in a soap opera. My god. The relationships, the intrigue, the stabbings, the doctor’s appointments. This is the best soap opera ever.

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